Just bitchin'

#Bowie — Life Like a Rainbow

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I don’t usually pay tribute to the passing of people I’ve never met, but today…

…oh, today of all days…I have to acknowledge David Bowie, gone from us at age 69 after a very private battle with cancer.

When I was little he was already a colorful burst, exploding without apology across music, movies, pop culture. He was unique, odd, strange, quixotic. His style was chameleonic, a constant reinvention of freedom of expression.

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‘Sham glam’ was the term that birthed into my child’s mind when I first saw him. It’s still my private label for the style of a firebird. I’m the girl who gravitated toward beads and glitter and rhinestones and color, mostly because of watching people like Bowie at my fashion-formative age.

So today I’ll play his music and tonight I’ll watch ‘The Man Who Fell To Earth’…

…and I’ll do it all spangled from head to toe…

Thank you, Mr. Bowie, for a life like a rainbow.

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Just bitchin'

Saliva With Your Sprinkles

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Oh, dear.

Another silly celeb spouting stupidity.

Oh, dear.

So in case you haven’t heard, a minor celebrity named Ariana Grande went into a donut shop, bellied-up to the counter upon which rested a tray of the pastries…licked them…and turned away muttering how much she hates America. Then she stuffed a previously un-licked donut into her mouth. All in plain view and hearing of the shop’s surveillance camera.

Clearly, this woman will never be honored for her intellect.

There was and still is a huge outcry about her comments on hating the country that shelters her.

I honestly don’t care. Maybe I should. But I don’t. See…I’d have to respect her to care what comes out of her mouth. I don’t.

Oh, wait…I need to backtrack here.

I DO care tremendously about something that came out of her mouth. Saliva.

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She licked donuts that she had no intention of buying or eating. I hear she tells her fans she’s a vegan, but she did chow down on a non-vegan donut while in camera range…just not one of those she licked. The issue of lying to her fans about her diet doesn’t interest me in the least.

What I do care about is her complete lack of personal hygiene. I don’t care how low her IQ is; she should know not to trail her spit on other people’s food.

The woman herself has no relevance in most people’s lives, so her opinions are powerless. ISIS will not be recruiting her anytime soon, I’m sure.

And although there might be a pre-pubescent fan base somewhere who’d love to suck on her saliva, I doubt the donuts she defiled were meant for them.

So rude.

She’s made some bumbling attempts to apologize for her ‘I hate America’ statements, but not a word about her deplorable lack of manners and hygiene.

And now I have to amend my statement that Ms. Grande has no relevance in my life.

I will never look at donuts again without wondering if someone else’s DNA is lurking among the sprinkles…

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